Summary
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (Hold it right there, can we just call it The Hobbit? Good!) starts out in the future where Bilbo overly dramatically tells Frodo that he hasn't told him everything there is to know about his life (I personally wouldn't mind if my uncles didn't tell me every little snippet of his life, but, to each his own). He does this however, at a time when Frodo is not there. Presumably he's writing a letter to accompany Frodo's birthday gift of a life story book of Bilbo's life (Can Frodo get a refund on that?). Then, Bilbo, knowing that his house already smells enough like pot, goes out to smoke on the terrace. He dramatically flashes back (yes, the whole movie is a vivid flashback, ugh) to where he was sitting in the same place only younger.
A very old man (Gandalf) comes up and asks him if he wants to go on an adventure. If that had come from anybody less harmless looking, I would have been freaked out. Bilbo, however, was freaked out and ran into his house. Now's the part where I would start to get really scared: Gandalf walked around the outside of Bilbo's house after Bilbo had locked the door, and looked through all the windows.
Gandalf finally gives up, and leaves. But first, he draws a symbol on Bilbo's door. (No, this isn't a thriller/horror film where the victim has been marked).
Bilbo is sitting down to a nice meal (Hobbits must exercise a lot to keep the themselves small enough to fit through their doors what with the amount they eat) when he gets a knock on the door. He goes to open it and several dwarfs fall inside. Over the course of the night, 13 dwarfs stumble over Bilbo's doorstep. They ransack his house and throw a party making Bilbo dry up his food supply (Which is saying something as Hobbits eat Second Breakfast!). As if to add insult to injury (or injury to insult, I don't know which is more appropriate for the situation), Gandalf (who, by the way, is also there) asks Bilbo to join on an adventure to get back the dwarfs gold from a tyrannic dragon Smaug. Then the dwarfs throw the lamest flash mob ever, making everyone sad instead of exited like usually happens, and Bilbo falls asleep.
When Bilbo wakes up the next morning, the dwarfs have gone. By the way, this is about an hour into the film by this time. Bilbo finds a contract and a note, both regarding the "adventure" that Gandalf and the dwarfs wanted him to go on. He signs to contract without reading it (Bilbo, not reading terms and conditions is bad! Google got in trouble for it you know!) and sprints to where the note said the dwarfs were. They are slowly trekking through the forest, their horses weighed down under the load of all of their stuff.
Some people bet that Bilbo wouldn't come and they pay up. Just so you know dwarfs, lobbing somebodies winnings on them as they ride is not a clever idea.
Bilbo asks if Gandalf is the only wizard (for yes, he is a wizard) and he says there is one name Radagast the Brown. It immediately cuts to the eccentric animal loving mad man of a wizard as he tries to nurse a seemingly dead raccoon back to health. Then something very odd happens that I didn't catch and suddenly Radagast's house has giant spiders crawling all over it. Then something else that nobody caught happens and the raccoon is fine. He goes away without thanking Radagast and the wizard jumps on his cart led by rabbits (I thought he was nice to animals) and goes flat out to tell Gandalf.
The dwarfs and Bilbo are at a cave one night when they hear Orc cries in the distance. One of the older dwarfs tells them about Thorin Oakenshields (The leader of the dwarfs) nemesis: The White Orc (dun dun dun)! Thorin tells the party that the Orc is dead but the camera conveniently catches Gandalf's disproving shake of his head that Thorin doesn't catch.
Naturally, it immediately cuts to The White Orc who is plotting to kill Thorin.
Radagast catches up with Gandalf just after Bilbo finishes tricking 3 trolls into dying conveniently in front of him and they are now being attacked by angry Orcs. Radagast tells Gandalf that he has seen a human Necromancer gaining power in an old castle of ghosts and then helps the dwarfs, Gandalf, and Bilbo by leading away the Orcs. Gandalf, despite the protests of Thorin, brings them to a safe house run by elves.
The leader of the elves whose name is Elrond, reads elvish words on a map that the dwarfs brought to help them find the mountain where their treasure is hidden. He gives them the key to finding the gold and then the dwarfs run away without the knowledge of Elrond or the evil in disguise Sauruman, leader of the wizards who comes to stop the dwarfs trip. He is very mad when Gandalf tells him they scarpered.
The dwarfs climb to the mountains and find a cave to take shelter from a vicious war between two rock giants (this story is starting to sound as weird as Alice and Wonderland).
In the middle of the night, Bilbo tries to leave but is stopped by one of the dwarfs. Then, the floor opens and they all fall (Gandalf is not with them) through a long tunnel with many turns that should have killed them all. Of course, it didn't because that would make a lousy ending.
The company lands in the Goblin caves. Bilbo is able to escape but a Goblin gets him. He falls with the Goblin but survives and we meet Gollum for the first time when he kills the Goblin. Stupidly, Bilbo follows him to his cave where they have their famous game of riddles. Bilbo finds a ring on his way to see Gollum and decides to chose now, as he has a bloodthirsty Gollum who thinks he stole his ring after him, to try it on. He turns invisible and follows Gollum to the exit.
Meanwhile, the dwarfs are brought before the king of the Goblins, a beefy guy with a big chin that hangs down oddly. He tells a servant goblin to go and tell the Orcs (to whom they are apparently in cahoots) that they have Thorin. He then has a recital of music before some of his servants chuck swords at his feet and he gets scared (why, we're not sure. I guess he prefers the gun. But still.)
Then, Gandalf arrives and they wage war on the Goblins in a battle that defies the usual rules of physics (Hollywood strikes again!). They leave the Goblin cave and Bilbo meets up with them again without telling them that he has a ring that can make him invisible.
They are then accosted by Orcs riding their Wargs (kind of like a copy of the wolves at the end of The Hunger Games) and all of the dwarfs, Bilbo, and Gandalf climb into a tree which the Orcs knock over so it's hanging over a cliff. Thorin goes to fight The White Orc and, right before he is going to die, Bilbo saves him and they are taken away by Gandalf's friends the Eagles. Thorin then almost proposes to Bilbo in thanks and the film ends with a bird flying to the far off lonely mountain and Smaug's eyes opening.
Bilbo is sitting down to a nice meal (Hobbits must exercise a lot to keep the themselves small enough to fit through their doors what with the amount they eat) when he gets a knock on the door. He goes to open it and several dwarfs fall inside. Over the course of the night, 13 dwarfs stumble over Bilbo's doorstep. They ransack his house and throw a party making Bilbo dry up his food supply (Which is saying something as Hobbits eat Second Breakfast!). As if to add insult to injury (or injury to insult, I don't know which is more appropriate for the situation), Gandalf (who, by the way, is also there) asks Bilbo to join on an adventure to get back the dwarfs gold from a tyrannic dragon Smaug. Then the dwarfs throw the lamest flash mob ever, making everyone sad instead of exited like usually happens, and Bilbo falls asleep.
When Bilbo wakes up the next morning, the dwarfs have gone. By the way, this is about an hour into the film by this time. Bilbo finds a contract and a note, both regarding the "adventure" that Gandalf and the dwarfs wanted him to go on. He signs to contract without reading it (Bilbo, not reading terms and conditions is bad! Google got in trouble for it you know!) and sprints to where the note said the dwarfs were. They are slowly trekking through the forest, their horses weighed down under the load of all of their stuff.
Some people bet that Bilbo wouldn't come and they pay up. Just so you know dwarfs, lobbing somebodies winnings on them as they ride is not a clever idea.
Bilbo asks if Gandalf is the only wizard (for yes, he is a wizard) and he says there is one name Radagast the Brown. It immediately cuts to the eccentric animal loving mad man of a wizard as he tries to nurse a seemingly dead raccoon back to health. Then something very odd happens that I didn't catch and suddenly Radagast's house has giant spiders crawling all over it. Then something else that nobody caught happens and the raccoon is fine. He goes away without thanking Radagast and the wizard jumps on his cart led by rabbits (I thought he was nice to animals) and goes flat out to tell Gandalf.
The dwarfs and Bilbo are at a cave one night when they hear Orc cries in the distance. One of the older dwarfs tells them about Thorin Oakenshields (The leader of the dwarfs) nemesis: The White Orc (dun dun dun)! Thorin tells the party that the Orc is dead but the camera conveniently catches Gandalf's disproving shake of his head that Thorin doesn't catch.
Naturally, it immediately cuts to The White Orc who is plotting to kill Thorin.
Radagast catches up with Gandalf just after Bilbo finishes tricking 3 trolls into dying conveniently in front of him and they are now being attacked by angry Orcs. Radagast tells Gandalf that he has seen a human Necromancer gaining power in an old castle of ghosts and then helps the dwarfs, Gandalf, and Bilbo by leading away the Orcs. Gandalf, despite the protests of Thorin, brings them to a safe house run by elves.
The leader of the elves whose name is Elrond, reads elvish words on a map that the dwarfs brought to help them find the mountain where their treasure is hidden. He gives them the key to finding the gold and then the dwarfs run away without the knowledge of Elrond or the evil in disguise Sauruman, leader of the wizards who comes to stop the dwarfs trip. He is very mad when Gandalf tells him they scarpered.
The dwarfs climb to the mountains and find a cave to take shelter from a vicious war between two rock giants (this story is starting to sound as weird as Alice and Wonderland).
In the middle of the night, Bilbo tries to leave but is stopped by one of the dwarfs. Then, the floor opens and they all fall (Gandalf is not with them) through a long tunnel with many turns that should have killed them all. Of course, it didn't because that would make a lousy ending.
The company lands in the Goblin caves. Bilbo is able to escape but a Goblin gets him. He falls with the Goblin but survives and we meet Gollum for the first time when he kills the Goblin. Stupidly, Bilbo follows him to his cave where they have their famous game of riddles. Bilbo finds a ring on his way to see Gollum and decides to chose now, as he has a bloodthirsty Gollum who thinks he stole his ring after him, to try it on. He turns invisible and follows Gollum to the exit.
Meanwhile, the dwarfs are brought before the king of the Goblins, a beefy guy with a big chin that hangs down oddly. He tells a servant goblin to go and tell the Orcs (to whom they are apparently in cahoots) that they have Thorin. He then has a recital of music before some of his servants chuck swords at his feet and he gets scared (why, we're not sure. I guess he prefers the gun. But still.)
Then, Gandalf arrives and they wage war on the Goblins in a battle that defies the usual rules of physics (Hollywood strikes again!). They leave the Goblin cave and Bilbo meets up with them again without telling them that he has a ring that can make him invisible.
They are then accosted by Orcs riding their Wargs (kind of like a copy of the wolves at the end of The Hunger Games) and all of the dwarfs, Bilbo, and Gandalf climb into a tree which the Orcs knock over so it's hanging over a cliff. Thorin goes to fight The White Orc and, right before he is going to die, Bilbo saves him and they are taken away by Gandalf's friends the Eagles. Thorin then almost proposes to Bilbo in thanks and the film ends with a bird flying to the far off lonely mountain and Smaug's eyes opening.
Review
I've got a couple of thoughts on this movie. First off, the film is nothing like the book. I included it in my list of 5 movies that are nothing like the book. The White Orc? What's that from? I think they accidentally mixed The Hobbit with The Rabbit but, com to think of it, I think a book called The Rabbit would be much less likely to have an Orc in it than The Hobbit. Saurumon is not in the book, but he does play a small part int the movie being like everyone's belligerent granddad who wants things his way. Radagast is another character who might have been based on something from the book, but was, even if he was in the novel, a much much more important character in the film.
Also, this movie defies physics which is a little annoying. In real life, you couldn't fall down a 5000 foot long stone tunnel, get smashed against the walls 20 times, and live. Also in one part, the dead Goblin King falls on the dwarfs and he was at least twenty times larger than them.
Finally, I don't know if you caught this Peter Jackson, but you left out 3 quarters of the story. Just kidding, I know they did it because Harry Potter made so much money off of 7P1 and 7P2 and Twilight got successful with two parts as well, but it's getting crazy. Their making The Hobbit into 2, maybe 3 parts and Mockingjay is also going to be split (little bonus fact).
Posters
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Parental Guidance Information
This movie is not appropriate for young children. If you've read the book, you'll know that it's pretty violent as is and they make it much more so in the movie. Some of the worst parts are the flashbacks. I'm actually quite surprised that this movie made PG 13. I, personally, would have thought that it would be R. I'd say that you should be at least 13 to watch this movie without supervision and with supervision, 10. If you want to take your kid to see The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey ans he/she gets scared easily, here are some scenes to look out for:
- Battle of Erebor (First Scene)
- Battle of Moria (Flashback, starts with dwarfs on the side of a mountain.)
- Any scene with the White Orc
Profanity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Violence:1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Sex: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
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