I Gotta Go!!! I Gotta Go!!! How to avoid the embarrassing and somewhat annoying quick exit of the theater to use the restroom!

     Hey, this may be a little (a lot) embarrassing, and not the most dignified thing to be talking about but it is really annoying and slightly embarrassing to have to leave the theater in the middle of a really good scene to use the restroom. So, I have compiled a list of three ways that work to help get you through the movie without needing to (final word too undignified to put in this article). While some of them may seem like "duh", I didn't miss the final battle in Ender's Game or the epic fight scene and unlikable main character in Elysium because of them.

1: Do Not Drink During The Show.

     I know, it's tempting. I love to get Icees and giant "small" DietCokes (the drink) at the snack bar, or even saving a little money and "illegally" buying candy and drinks and smuggling them into the movie. However, in the few times where it's been so late (Ender's Game) or I've forgotten to "pre-buy" food (Getaway and Elysium), I haven't needed to, how do I say this, well, relieve myself.

2: Do Your Business Before You Sit Down.

     For me at least, it's annoying to even get up and use the bathroom during the "First Look" or the trailers. However, getting up to DYB (Do Your Biz), even as late as"The Following Preview Has Been Approved For Appropriate Audiences" is much better than missing the biggest secret reveal in the entire movie because Mother Nature calls. I also find it helpful to DYB before I get to the movies a couple of times, especially if I've drunk a lot that day.

3: The Power Of The Brain.

     According to my mom (everybody's mother seems to do this, am I right), there is a study that shows that if you tell yourself you can, can't, or in this case won't do something, you probably can, can't, won't. This is (even though I pretty much tune my mother out when she goes into her psychological stuff) true for mothernaturing and the movies. If you tell yourself you won't need to DYB, you probably won't. Now, this is not necessarily true if (a) you've drunk the Thames river (you'll probably die from all the bad stuff that's in it anyway, so I wouldn't be worrying about DYBing and the movies at that point), or (b) you are going to see The Toilet Movie or Waterfalls: A Drama With Lots of Waterfall Sounds! 

     So there you have it! Even though it sounds a little embarrassing, it works. These things (am I repeating myself?) helped me stay inside the theater for 3 movies (naturally, not all at once. I couldn't stop nature's calling for that long)! Hope it helped. Remember to share this with your friends if you think they are a little leaky! If your friend shared this with you, take the hint!